I like guys. No, I don’t like guys.. But that one I saw in store was cute.. No, its just that he was good looking and straight people also like and appreciate beauty of same sex. God, why can’t I stop thinking about Barbier, he is so nice, polite, he speaks good, dresses well, so confident. And I simply like spending time with him. and last time when we met, he showed me his apartment, his room was a bit messed up but that’s ok. Room of bachelor guys is of that kind. Wait, I started liking girls. I get arousal by thinking of cute, pretty, thin delicate girl. It’s so positive that I started liking girls. Now I could marry if I find a girl of such specs in real world. Oh, I forgot I’m a Bipolar too. Would she be able to tolerate my crazy mood swings? Would she try to accommodate with my illness. What if I have cravings for a guy and same night, she needs a passionate sex. I don’t know. Seriously I don’t.
I want to make a confession here, I am obsessed with a straight friend who was my ex-colleague as well. His name is Beirber. It’s not the first time I’m obsessed with any straight friend but this time this infatuation/obsession is more intense. I can’t stop thinking about him. I smile remembering good moments with him at my last job. He was senior when I joined and worked in brand management. We attended a training course together, and I started liking him. Then we became friends and he used to come to my desk and we started talking almost every day in fact on Facebook and Skype too. We shared some secrets and life goals with each other. This companionship lasted for 3-4 months then we both left the company.
We have been in contact on Facebook but never met again or talked for a long time. I just jump into his photo albums to see his latest pictures.
There’s not any sexual thing involved but I like thinking about him. In fact he has all qualities I would see in my boy friend: looks, career, attitude and decency. These traits make a rare combination in gay people. Most of the gay men are metro-sexual who take good care of their appearance and body. But decency and sincerity are rare to find in gay community. We should not ignore the minority of decent gays but unfortunately, majority of gay people are more attracted towards quick sex and always ready to get laid rather struggling for a companionship or relationship.
That’s the reason, people who are interested in monogamy and serious long term, often get attracted towards their straight friends. They see a reflection of their ideal in best friend. When a friend brings a gift and offers you a dinner treat, you get too excited and undertake extra preparations for the occasion. You give true compliments on your friend’s achievement and sincere advice and moral support when he needs, that brings him closer to you. He thinks you’re his best friend and shares his relationship stories and you have no option than listening and pretending you’re so interested in his relationship.