Today my friend took me to a massage center, he is my straight friend and recently I came out as Bipolar and homosexual. I did masturbate thinking off nude pretty girls, technically that makes me bisexual but my inclination is more towards guys or it keeps on changing as per my medicine dose. My friend suggested me to explore myself. Get out of internet articles on sexual orientation and reasoning and questioning and get into practical exposure, to know my inner self and actual desire.
Initially I was reluctant to go to massage center out of general fear and shyness, secondly I’m hypomanic these days and taking Risperidone 6 mg which is quite enough to keep your penis down. But two days back I went back to my imaginative world and saw two boys lying on bed, the close up of their face (one with tattoo) made me feel masturbated on bed without thinking of hygiene. However, I took bath later on. So I could fight well with Risperidone due to my imaginative tendency.
When we went into the parlour and girls came in front of me, honestly I was like yuck. Not a single one was pretty enough to grab my attention but their in-charge offered me to provide me her services. She was fair, tall, and chubby, that’s all I could recall about her. I told her that we couldn’t have happy hour as I don’t get erection these days.
I asked her why she is here, what brings her here, what does it feel when she gets naked in front of every man and be used like a condom. Her replies made me shocked. She has two siblings and parents and lives in a reasonable area. Brother is married and sister works with her in same parlour but on leave today.
She was licking my nipple and rubbing my body with lotion but I was least interested. I asked is she happy with her life? She said who is happy, Nobody. But we have to show the world that we are happy. This is as important to live as to breathe.
She asked me why you’re depressed, I said I don’t know. She said you’re smart, good looking, tall, fit why don’t you fuck some pretty girl. Don’t you like to fuck a girl? I said I don’t know. I just laid down like a dead body and she was playing with my body and tried to get my attention.
I asked if kidnapped girls are brought here and forcefully entered in this profession, she said don’t read stupid books. Only 2 % happens like this what you’re saying. Rest of all are happy with their job. They are living a luxurious life. She validated her point very well by saying she is illiterate and could hardly earn Rupees 10,000 monthly and she earns this amount daily over here. She has everything to be happy.
She tried hard on her blow job but failed and I asked to stop because I know for me compatibility is more important. I got sexual pleasure and I saw a naked woman live first time in life. I’m happy
She asked me to stop thinking and feel pity on prostitutes; they are happily doing their job. And last thing she said, You are handsome, keep smiling and stop this medicine (that she didn’t know) and come back again to me.
I came home, took shower and thought about her body parts, and went into imaginative mood, and you would be surprised to know I ejaculated with immense pleasure. She gave a realization that is so important for me.